Commonunity - Common Problems

Five years ago, a friend invited me to her house. She and her husband welcomed me graciously into their home. We were not alone. As the kids ran off to play, we descended into the basement to join the other couples, seated in neat rows in front of the T.V.

I had joined a small group. I agreed to join before I really knew what it meant. I stood, clutching my standard, church issued, blue bible. Would it shield me from harm or danger? These people would seem harmless enough if encountered in ones or twos, but assembled as they were, as a pack, I was intimidated. "Don’t be fooled by their easy smiles and the punch and cookies," I cautioned myself. What did I have in common with these people? How could they understand my life and its problems?

We took turns introducing ourselves. With each story, I felt more out of place. I was new to church, still teetering in my faith, just a toddler in my faith-walk. Surrounding me was a room filled with bible-study veterans. My head started to spin. It seemed that everyone there was born and raised in a faith-filled environment and had never strayed from the path. Not me. I had a past. I had enough skeletons in my closet for a Halloween parade. How long would it take for them to run me out of the house with pitchforks and torches?

We started the video. I felt safe with the lights out. Rick Warren’s voice was comforting and the message was inspiring. I longed for comfort and encouragement. I came seeking a purpose for my life.

After the lights came on, we began to share. Although I felt my history, my understanding, and my experiences were unique, it turned out, we had so much in common. As I looked past their fancy Bibles with gold leaf edges, indexed tabs and custom carry cases, I realized we were not that different. We were all broken and hurting. We had all made mistakes. Deep down, our problems were all the same. We came before God seeking direction and answers. We joined as a group seeking comfort and compassion.

"No temptation has seized you except what is common to man. And God is faithful; he will not let you be tempted beyond what you can bear. But when you are tempted, he will also provide a way out so that you can stand up under it." (1 Corinthians 10:13).

As you go about your busy life and your busy week, be on the lookout. All of us struggle with loneliness, endure fears, seek purpose, and search for connections in a disconnected world. Look for those who need your help. We can provide a way out and a way through for those in need. We can borrow the strength and compassion of God and serve those in our community. Like strands of thread that grow strong when joined together as rope, we must stand together and share our common problems.

Our small group came together. Saving, helping, keeping and loving each other, together we grew stronger. No one cared about my plain blue bible. They cared about me.

“Carry each other’s burdens. Let us do good to all people.” (Galatians 6:2,10).

Common Grounds - Every Child Needs a Laptop

"All children need a laptop. Not a computer, but a human laptop. Moms, Dads, Grannies and Grandpas, Aunts, Uncles - someone to hold them, read to them, teach them. Loved ones who will embrace them and pass on the experience, rituals and knowledge of a hundred previous generations. Loved ones who will pass to the next generation their expectations of them, their hopes , and their dreams." General Colin Powell

I love Colin Powell’s quote. It prompts me to find a small child to plant on my lap. There is immense power in a laptop - a most intimate seating - to convey knowledge, experience, and great expectations.

My own youth was blessed with warm embraces and laptop chats. I was bathed in the love of my parents. From them I learned how to love and how to serve. The hours spent at my mother’s side in the kitchen introduced me to the touches that turn an ordinary meal into a loving occasion. Mom opened my eyes to the importance of details. Meanwhile, my Dad encouraged me to think big. We worked together for years and I learned about perseverance, quick wit and how to sell the sizzle not the steak.

I spent ample time on my parents’ laptops. I was held, read to, and lovingly taught. My mother’s soft caress invited me to linger. She read to my brother and me each night as we explored the amazing fantasy world of novels. My father’s work caused him to travel extensively. Each faraway trip was an opportunity for a private laptop reunion. My parents were clear they had big expectations of me, hopes for a successful career and marriage and future. So what was missing?

Read James 3:17 and you’ll discover the missing ingredient. "...Wisdom that comes from heaven is first of all pure; then peace-loving, considerate, submissive, full of mercy and good fruit, impartial and sincere." Although our family life was filled with love, we forgot to include God’s lessons. The rich teachings I received were far from complete, for how can you learn of love and omit the most famous teacher? As Paul advised in Colossians 3:12-14, "...clothe yourselves with compassion, kindness, humility, gentleness and patience. Bear with each other and forgive whatever grievances you may have against one another. Forgive as the Lord forgave you. And over all these virtues put on love, which binds them all together is perfect unity."

I’m grateful to God for sending other teachers and other "laptops". Aunt Rosie reminded me not to be too busy to pray. A neighbor, Mrs. Brown, modeled authenticity and encouraged purity. Their teachings often fell on the deaf ears of a 12 or 17 or 24-year-old. Sometimes messages were lost or unappreciated. They didn’t give up on me and for that I am blessed.

I wonder, were they apprehensive sharing these values with me? Did they ever waver and wonder, "should I or shouldn’t I?"

Looking at Paul in Acts 17:16-23, I am humbled by his courage. He was ever brave and sure. If he had doubts about speaking the truth of God’s mercy through Jesus, there is no proof of it in his actions in Athens.

I look to my own children and wonder what message am I sending them? What lessons will they carry in their hearts? Not just the lessons from daily prayers or mealtime thanksgivings or evening devotions, what will they learn from our common everyday life?

As my parents grow old in years, I face the prospects of the tables being turned; someday I’ll be their caregiver. When my turn comes to hold them in my arms and wipe away their tears and calm their fears, will I have shared all they need to know?

I pray for the courage to share the Gospel with all those I love. I need courage. To be completely honest, I fear ridicule and rejection from those I love. Will they react as the philosophers did to Paul in Athens saying, "What is this babbler trying to say?" What if I never even try to share God’s promise? What then? My deeper fear is that I would miss my opportunity to spend eternity with them.

I pray that, like Paul, I will press forward in finding some common grounds to build upon. Rather than focusing on the difference between us, we can start with all we have in common. We want to be together to share love, laughter and a good meal.